So to be honest, I've been a depressed piece of shit lately, last Thursday I ended up getting dumped for reasons unknown to me, and I lost one of the closest people to me, My best friend that I have known all of my life since early childhood committed suicide, I feel like a terrible friend because I was not there for him when he needed me most, I wasn't available when he was crying for help and for that I want to die, the pain is all too real and I don't know how to handle it anymore